Cool things to reply when a help desk asks you for your IP address
1) Are you joking? Just get it from my email header.
2) Sorry, I'm not giving my IP to anyone, that's private information.
3) What's an IP? I didn't realise you had to have a degree in computer science to use the internet.
4) It was 74.43.218.22 yesterday, but it changed.
5) Thanks for asking.
6) You should know. You blocked it.
7) I'm not sure, let me call my ISP and I'll let you know.
8) What do you need that for?
9) Don't bother, I always use proxies when accessing your site.
10) Sorry, I don't think I have an IP.
11) I think it's internet explorer but I could be wrong.
12) I can't imagine just giving my IP without any compensation.
Thursday
Sunday
Seen on the internet today
Let it be known that I don't feel proud of myself for making fun of someone else's typos. I am not perfect myself, and I make plenty of typos. Of course, I blame it on an invisible force switching the keys around on me while I'm typing.
Anyways, seen on the internet today:
To be fair, I blocked out the site name. I'm not sure if it would "benifit" me to contact their "profesional support" though :)
Anyways, seen on the internet today:
To be fair, I blocked out the site name. I'm not sure if it would "benifit" me to contact their "profesional support" though :)
Monday
The Dog Drama
Hi guys,
It looks like I have two banned accounts at your forum, usernames are Tibor and Veleta. I have no idea what went wrong here. Surely this is a mistake, can you take a look please?
Thank you very much
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
It is against forum rules to use more than one account on the forum. It appears that you have been using three accounts: Usernames Joyce, Tibor and Veleta. We have banned Tibor and Veleta. You are free to continue using the Joyce account.
Thanks
James
Hi James,
Technically, those accounts aren't mine, I made them for my dogs. I fully consider my dogs to be part of the family. It doesn't say in the rules that family members can't have an account. Please reconsider. My dogs are in such a good routine. They sit on a chair next to me when I browse the forum, and once we are done browsing, they get their treats. I am very upset that my fur babies can't be a part of your forum. To prove that those really are my dogs, I have included pictures:
oh and by the way, you missed the Charlie account. That is my turtle. If my turtle can stay, then you should let my dogs stay as well.
Thanks
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We were unaware of the fact that you had four accounts, thanks for pointing that out. Unfortunately, we also had to ban Charlie. Again, you are free to continue using your Joyce account on the forum.
Thanks
James
Hi James,
I am heartbroken. My dogs can go to the park with me, they can go to the beach with me, they can walk in the street with me, but they can't visit your forum with me? Don't you feel this is discrimination?
I am not too concerned with Charlie, he was banned from facebook too, (let me know if you want some juicy details on that, it's a long story). While part of the family, I don't really consider Charlie my "baby", he's more like a nephew or something. But Tibor and Veleta... I really am heartbroken by this.
I read your rules very carefully and it does not say anywhere that dogs are not allowed to be a part of the forum. Please reconsider, this is a serious issue.
Thanks for your time
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We have adjusted our rules, please read rule 5 of section 3.:
5) Only human beings are allowed to register at our forums. We do not allow registrations for dogs, turtles, elephants, or any animals whatsoever.
Thank you
James
Hi James,
The problem here is that I registered those accounts for my dogs before you changed the rules. Therefore, those rules do not apply to my dogs. A few years ago, they changed the laws so that people could no longer smoke at restaurants. Did they fine restaurant owners for allowing smokers before the laws were changed? No of course not. I think I have a case here and I won't hesitate to pursue it. I took a screen shot of your rules before you modified them, I found the old set of rules on google's cached pages.
I don't have a choice but to contact my lawyer.
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We have unbanned your Veleta and Tibor accounts.
Sorry for the inconvenience.
James
Hi James,
Thank you ever so much, it's really appreciated.
Joyce
P.S. Don't worry about Charlie, he's really not into forum participation.
Oh and how about my Jaws, Oranjo, Squibble, and Boomer accounts? Can they stay? These are my gold fish.
It looks like I have two banned accounts at your forum, usernames are Tibor and Veleta. I have no idea what went wrong here. Surely this is a mistake, can you take a look please?
Thank you very much
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
It is against forum rules to use more than one account on the forum. It appears that you have been using three accounts: Usernames Joyce, Tibor and Veleta. We have banned Tibor and Veleta. You are free to continue using the Joyce account.
Thanks
James
Hi James,
Technically, those accounts aren't mine, I made them for my dogs. I fully consider my dogs to be part of the family. It doesn't say in the rules that family members can't have an account. Please reconsider. My dogs are in such a good routine. They sit on a chair next to me when I browse the forum, and once we are done browsing, they get their treats. I am very upset that my fur babies can't be a part of your forum. To prove that those really are my dogs, I have included pictures:
oh and by the way, you missed the Charlie account. That is my turtle. If my turtle can stay, then you should let my dogs stay as well.
Thanks
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We were unaware of the fact that you had four accounts, thanks for pointing that out. Unfortunately, we also had to ban Charlie. Again, you are free to continue using your Joyce account on the forum.
Thanks
James
Hi James,
I am heartbroken. My dogs can go to the park with me, they can go to the beach with me, they can walk in the street with me, but they can't visit your forum with me? Don't you feel this is discrimination?
I am not too concerned with Charlie, he was banned from facebook too, (let me know if you want some juicy details on that, it's a long story). While part of the family, I don't really consider Charlie my "baby", he's more like a nephew or something. But Tibor and Veleta... I really am heartbroken by this.
I read your rules very carefully and it does not say anywhere that dogs are not allowed to be a part of the forum. Please reconsider, this is a serious issue.
Thanks for your time
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We have adjusted our rules, please read rule 5 of section 3.:
5) Only human beings are allowed to register at our forums. We do not allow registrations for dogs, turtles, elephants, or any animals whatsoever.
Thank you
James
Hi James,
The problem here is that I registered those accounts for my dogs before you changed the rules. Therefore, those rules do not apply to my dogs. A few years ago, they changed the laws so that people could no longer smoke at restaurants. Did they fine restaurant owners for allowing smokers before the laws were changed? No of course not. I think I have a case here and I won't hesitate to pursue it. I took a screen shot of your rules before you modified them, I found the old set of rules on google's cached pages.
I don't have a choice but to contact my lawyer.
Joyce
Hi Joyce,
We have unbanned your Veleta and Tibor accounts.
Sorry for the inconvenience.
James
Hi James,
Thank you ever so much, it's really appreciated.
Joyce
P.S. Don't worry about Charlie, he's really not into forum participation.
Oh and how about my Jaws, Oranjo, Squibble, and Boomer accounts? Can they stay? These are my gold fish.
Sunday
Profanity Filter
Hi,
I am using your blog software and noticed there is a profanity filter.
How do I turn it off? I can't find it in the settings.
Thanks in advance for any help you can give me.
Julia
Hello Julia,
The profanity filter is built into the code and cannot be turned off.
Sorry about any inconvenience this may cause you.
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
Thanks for replying, I appreciate it.
Is there any way you can turn it off, just for my blog? It's important.
Thanks
Julia
Hello Julia,
We use the same code across all servers and all blogs, I'm afraid there is no way to make an exception.
You have a blog about outdoor fun for children, is there any particular reason why you'd like to have the profanity filter turned off?
Thanks
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
Yes there is a reason. I wrote a blog post about how to plant pussy willows and it displays as %$@*&! willows, that looks pretty ugly.
Thanks
Julia
Hello Julia,
Try p u s s y willows, that should work.
Thanks
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
F a n t a s t i c, that worked!
Thank you ever so much!
Julia
I am using your blog software and noticed there is a profanity filter.
How do I turn it off? I can't find it in the settings.
Thanks in advance for any help you can give me.
Julia
Hello Julia,
The profanity filter is built into the code and cannot be turned off.
Sorry about any inconvenience this may cause you.
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
Thanks for replying, I appreciate it.
Is there any way you can turn it off, just for my blog? It's important.
Thanks
Julia
Hello Julia,
We use the same code across all servers and all blogs, I'm afraid there is no way to make an exception.
You have a blog about outdoor fun for children, is there any particular reason why you'd like to have the profanity filter turned off?
Thanks
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
Yes there is a reason. I wrote a blog post about how to plant pussy willows and it displays as %$@*&! willows, that looks pretty ugly.
Thanks
Julia
Hello Julia,
Try p u s s y willows, that should work.
Thanks
Marina
Blog help desk staff
Hi Marina,
F a n t a s t i c, that worked!
Thank you ever so much!
Julia
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